Cinco De MOMo

I grew up watching this show.  I played along most mornings in the summer.  Bob Barker and his BEA-uties were regular 10 am friends.  I had little problem selecting grocery items based on cost.  In fact I'd daydream that Bobbie would call me on stage and I'd be screaming like a maniac when I was told I would be playing PLINKO! Seriously, Plinko- my absolute favorite game.  I'd drop plastic disks down the peg board one by one. Sometimes I would hit big- once in a while I went bankrupt.

I've never really had a hard time deciding on the value of things. Which costs more or less? Peanut butter vs. Neosporin...Pah-lease Bob, who are you fool'n?  Fast forward to today...It's not 10 am and Barkers not on stage.  I guess I'm still playing, deciding which is more valuable.  Time with husband, myself, my kids, my family...the list goes on.

I was told 2 days ago that I spread myself too thin.  That I need to prioritize- that I JUST CAN'T DO IT ALL.  I had to step back and take a look at that and how I have been valuing things lately.  I look at my life like a juggling act.  Each priority of something I value has its own ball.  At different stages, I drop a ball or two.  It's life, sometimes my boys outweigh work or sometimes my husband comes before myself.  Lately I haven't been juggling myself very well.

 

She's pretty with-it, isn't she?  Really she's not.  She's bound to drop something because you just can't do it all at once.  I had too many balls in the air, so I made myself prioritize and narrow things down. And slow the rotation down.  I was losing myself and in the process not able to be 100% present with my boys, job or family.  In my drive to do it all, I wasn't really doing anything well.

I sat down last night and asked myself what was more valuable.  Juggling 3 jobs so I can give my boys what they needed or juggling 1 job and being 100% present- just being with them, listening to them. 

I made a few changes. 1. no more rushing home shoving down dinner so I can get to work and rush J to his soccer practice, karate class, or boy scout meeting.  I agree that being involved is important.  But not to the point that his involvement in things leaves less time for us as a family.  So I've set a rule.  Only 1 night of extra curricular activities, 1 night of 1 on 1 time with dad and I, and 1 night where we are all a family.  I know it sounds simple and most families do this anyway, but we weren't- we were too busy.  I had to schedule it in. In a way that makes me sad.  I undervalued my relationship with him because I thought he would get more from other people and experiences, when it was leaving him lonely and craving our attention. 

2. I am important.  If I don't take care of myself and make myself happy, then no one else can.  Being happy starts with me.  I can no longer blame my husband for my unhappiness.  Sure, he adds to it, but it isn't his job.  On the other hand, I cannot always be the gardener in our relationship.  There needs to be balance.  I'm not talking about a Showcase Showdown, but we need to schedule time in for each other, too.

3. I need to schedule in time for myself- physical, mental and spiritual.  I had been running on months of personal withdrawals until I found myself bankrupt...Most women cry it out in the shower- I however took it out on my lawn mower on Wednesday. Imagine that.

What do you value? What is more important in your life? Things? Relationships? Take time this weekend to reprioritize.

Keep on Keep'n On

Collide

The word even sounds violent.

I'm getting ready to start the final theme in my classroom.  The last 4 weeks we are focusing on JUMP. We are looking at areas in our lives that we want to make jumps.

In order to jump you have to have faith.  Many of my students lack faith in themselves.  Confidence that they "can and will."  I don't think this is just an issue for 11 year olds.  This is an issue many people face every day. The courage, will and faith that you "can and will".

In order to make a jump one has to be willing to collide.  When 2 objects collide, 1 object is always changed. It is through these collisions that we grow as people.  What if you never collided with anything?  Where would your life have taken you?

It's scary to think about, but as adults we sometimes stop colliding on purpose.  When that happens, I think God has a way of putting things in our path to force change- good or bad.  With that comes hope- believing that something good can come from something bad.  So never lose hope.  

Many ordinary people have faced extraordinary collisions where they had to have faith- in themselves and a higher power.  Here are a few that we are looking at this week.

Crew and Passengers on the TITANIC. Many gave up their seats so more women and children could be saved.  Some did not.  Do you remember the musicians at the end?  Even when the ship was sinking, they kept playing!
Aron Ralston- a hiker who cut off his own arm when he was trapped in a 3-foot slot canyon in Canyonlands National Park.
Mark Pfetzer: in May 1996 the media scrambled to document the gripping story of the sixteen-year-old's expedition to Mount Everest. Not only was he the youngest climber ever to attempt the summit, he also witnessed the tragedy of 8 other climbers dying in a sudden storm.
Bethany Hamilton- a 13 year-old surfer whose left arm was bitten off by a shark. It took 20 minutes of paddling to get her back on shore.
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Kendall Ciesemier understood the human struggle at a young age.  At age 11 as she underwent two liver transplants, Kendall started Kids Caring 4 Kids (KC4K), a non-profit that raises money and awareness for highly vulnerable children in Africa by inspiring youth worldwide to care for others in need.
Alex, a 4 year old cancer patient, started her own front yard lemonade stand to help raise money to find a cure for cancer- it's turned into a national movement that has raised millions. 

So really, if ordinary people can do extraordinary things, why can't you? Take a jump, a leap of faith- believe in yourself and collide with something, someone.  Even if you aren't changed, maybe the other object will be.

Eat this, not that

Healthy kids day was a success today 85 kids from 3 grade levels enjoyed learning about heart rate, living on food stamps, making healthy choices and did circuit training with a Rockstar mom/trainer that volunteered her time. Here are a few photos from my activity. I know they are all processed but these are kids we are talking about. Many have healthy role models but many do not.

Family Time

It was LONG overdue. We took the boys swimming at the Kroc Center, tried to conquer the rock wall and topped it off with ice cream. I love days like this.

We live on one income-mine- and it is no jackpot. Matt's Menards check covers his health insurance, since my policy refuses to carry him because he has a parttime job. People against OBama's healthcare plan have never struggled. I'm sympathetic to that.

We took $35 and splurged. I laugh at that because 2 years ago I wouldn't have even thought twice about doing it. This is the first time this year we have done anything "not in the budget" beyond traveling to see my parents. As I type this I almost want to cry thinking about it. Only 15 more months of this! But I am so grateful that we still could do it. Grateful I have another job that can cover 2 hours of giggles.

Of course before we went I had to do 2 loads of laundry, work at the Y, dishes, clean, school work and lunches for next week. Phew! It was so worth it though. :). Now I will continue to relax with a rousing game of SORRY. Enjoy your family.

Flying Solo

So I can't help but treasure times I am alone.  They are few and fair between. I usually get 3-4 minutes in the car to and from day care, but as I sit here and really think about it, I get more time than that.  I sit here at 4 am on daylight savings time chicken pecking at my keyboard in a dark room with only the hum of the furnace and the swoosh of the fish tank water ticklng my ear drums.  I am a hermit in some ways.  I find ways to be alone, because when I'm not my senses are firing on all 5 cylinders.

To say that this month has been exhausting would be an understatement. At school, students definitely have spring fever so the duty times of my day have been mentally and even physically exhausting.  Since I work in a public school, we work with many types of kids.  Kids that roll down the hall in a wheel chair with smiles tattooed on their faces to kids that would give Mahamad Ali a run for the belt. 

At home the boys seem to want to break down the walls and tear through the neighborhood.  They definitely need space, while our house is pretty big, they seem to always want the same thing at the same time.  Whomever looses the tug-o-war has learned that if the bellow like a bull for 67 seconds without a breath, the time will stop.  That is okay though because I see that spring is around the corner. 

I compete in many solitary activities- running, swimming, biking, reading- sports where I am my own enemy, partner and competition. The only winner/ loser is me.  I cannot blame anyone but myself for a big loss, for not giving120% each time the gun goes off.  That's why when my thoughts do not stay positive and that I don't believe, "I can, will and am" able of whatever challenge lies ahead I flail miserably.  I enjoy other solitary activities that are not work out related. One of my favorite guilty pleasures is going to a movie by myself. The last time I did this, I saw The Notebook. It was 7 years ago. 4 years ago I traveled to California by myself to meet my niece. That was a glorious 4 days.



I have this tool box of phrases, life moments, people who have struggles that cannot compare that I mentally pull out and set on my dining room table once in a while.  It's like a fisherman's tackle box with 2 tiers and 80 compartments.  When "phhhht" it folds open, this bright orange light pours through and I swear I hear voices of angels. It's that box that gets me through the pity parties and the, "I cannot handle another____ like this one."  The older I get, the more tackle I add.  The more I know myself.  It is in the solitary moments that I understand who I am, what I need and what I am made of. Taking the time to self-actualize changes the way I think about my past, my future goals, even my successes and failures. Not all learning needs too happen in they eye of a tornado. It's the change that takes place after I use that toolbox that is the most important thing.  If I didn't rebait and cast my hook, I would not move forward in life.

What are you casting your line for and with these days?  How do you enjoy your time spent alone?

A Comic